Tag: sleep

a woman's hand with dark nail polish, holding a pen, writing in a journal.. green and gold background and title set boundaries for how you treat yourself

Set boundaries for how you treat yourself

Last week, I spoke about boundaries and how they are a necessity when it comes to self-care. I wanted to expand on that, because while the boundaries you set for the relationships in your life are crucial, so are the boundaries you set for self-treatment. So today, I’m focusing on those.  This ranges from things like your routines to self-talk and more.

Just like the boundaries we set in relationships, personal boundaries for how we treat ourselves are important for building a healthier and more fulfilling life. I believe they are the foundation for almost every area of our lives and determining how things will play out.

Ditch the negative self-talk:

The first step I recommend in self-boundaries would be addressing negative self-talk. Set limits on your self-criticism and establish a positive internal dialogue. Pay attention so that you can recognize harmful thoughts and actively replace them with affirmations. Remember, the things you say and think directly affect the things you feel and believe. This means that curbing that negative self-talk can greatly improve your quality of life. And so a commitment to speak to yourself with kindness and compassion is a great start to setting your boundaries with yourself.

Prioritizing self-care over neglect:

Next, I’d say to set clear boundaries between self-care and self-neglect. Figure out the things that genuinely rejuvenate your mind and body, and commit to making time for them. Whether it’s a relaxing bath, reading a book, or practicing mindfulness and meditation, these moments need to be non-negotiable. You don’t need to be ‘busy’ all of the time. You just need to be intentional.

Make sure you’re getting quality sleep:

Moving on to your quality of sleep; this is a really important one. Set a consistent sleep schedule, create a bedtime routine, and make getting a good night’s sleep a priority. By setting this boundary with yourself to guarantee that you get the rest you need, you’re investing in both your mental and physical health which means you’ll feel better and even be more productive. Some other bonuses from this are better cognitive function and emotional resilience.

Find a balance with work and personal life:

Another big boundary to set is the separation or balance between work and personal time. This is especially important for entrepreneurs who often work crazy hours at crazy times. Overworking can lead to burnout and compromise your overall well-being. So it makes sense that we need to be firm on setting limits. Learn to say no to excessive work demands and create a schedule that allows for both productivity and relaxation. Also make sure that you’re getting some ‘me time’ every single day.

Pay attention to your nutrition.

Setting boundaries around nutrition involves making conscious choices about what you consume. Prioritize nourishing your body with wholesome foods, and establish limits on indulgences that are negatively affecting you. Listen to your body’s signals and respond with mindful eating. This might mean a little more time, effort or work, but the convenient and quick solutions are not always the answer. By making sure that your body is getting the nutrients that you need, you’ll feel better and have more energy. Odds are you’ll probably also see positive effects on things like your hair and your skin when you’re making sure that you’re getting the proper nutrition, along with less aches in your muscles and joints. Your mood and focus could also improve depending on what your current diet looks like and the changes that you put into motion.

Exercise and movement are important too.

I also recommend creating boundaries around exercise or movement that promote a healthy relationship with physical activity. It doesn’t have to be a hardcore workout. Choose things that bring you joy and make sure it aligns with your energy levels and capabilities.  For some this could mean things like yoga or walking. For others it could mean swimming or kickboxing. The important part is just to get your body moving.

How to set these boundaries:

(This is where I recommend breaking out the journal to form your plan.)

Start by thinking about your current habits and areas that might need adjustment. Clearly note these boundaries to yourself. Make sure that you’re viewing your commitments to yourself with the same importance as you would view your commitments to others. Be firm in enforcing them, but also give yourself grace. It can take time to establish new normal which will probably feel very uncomfortable at first. Like I mentioned last week, our brains are wired for the familiar. So even if a new thing is super positive compared to the old thing that might even be outright toxic, our brains struggle to make the transition with ease. It does get easier- don’t give up after one hard day.

Let your boundaries adapt with you.

Just as your boundaries with others are going to change as your life and experiences change, so should the boundaries you have with yourself. Be open to adjusting them as you grow and be sure to check in every once in a while to make sure that they are still having a positive effect in your life. Again, this is where journaling can be super helpful. Pay attention to how your new boundaries make you feel and what changes you see in your life. Change them up when they’re no longer effective or practical for your situation.

You don’t have to do it alone.

Overall, the biggest thing is that by choosing self-love and well-being, you are choosing you. I applaud you for that choice and wish you all of the success.  If you should need some additional help or guidance along the way, I’m here. Feel free to reach out to me. And again, I also offer one on one coaching as well as a free facebook community for additional support. You can check get more info by clicking the links, and of course feel free to reach out to me with any additional questions.

girl with red hair and purple shirt, smiling, orange dress, green and gold background, Melissa Pilatzke: An Empowered Voice

Prioritizing Sleep is Self Care

Do you struggle with sleep? I know that I do.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve had difficulty with insomnia and chronic fatigue and I’ve definitely felt the effects of it. That was why I was so intrigued when I met Melissa Pilatzke, who is a sleep consultant. I thought I was passionate about sleep just because I always wanted more, but after hearing her talk about it, I now know what being passionate about it really looks like. Sleep is so important to self care for both our mental and physical health, and I’m so glad that Melissa was generous enough to share some of her expertise with us!

Here’s what she has to say:

Have you ever noticed that sleep is a popular topic of conversation? People are constantly discussing their own sleep, their child’s sleep, their partner’s sleep, and it’s usually in the context of not getting enough of it! Sleep is a vital life function; human beings need sleep just as we need food, water, and air. Yet we are all guilty of making sleep a low priority at some points in our lives.

When you have a big test coming up, a presentation to prepare for, or you need to binge the new season of your favorite show, sleep gets sacrificed to make time to accomplish the task. And that’s fine from time to time but what usually happens is that we forget to prioritize sleep again once we’ve aced the test, nailed the presentation, or finished the season. This is where the trouble begins. Placing sleep as a low priority for days or weeks at a time will eventually cause some degree of sleep deprivation.

What Does This Have to Do with Self Care?

Take a moment to think about how being VERY tired affects you. If you are anything like me then you may experience headaches, loss of appetite, low energy, quick to anger, and the list goes on!

Now that you’ve thought about it that way, doesn’t it seem so clear that getting more sleep is essential to our self care?

Why do we do other self care activities? To recharge, right? Some more obvious items that come to mind when you are craving self care are to go for a nature walk, get your nails done, enjoy a long bath. These are all wonderful ideas too! They all help us to restore our bodies, our mental states, and our joy. But what is more restorative than sleep?

So, the next time you find yourself exhausted, try prioritizing your sleep for a few days to a week. Commit to going to bed early instead of scrolling Instagram or watching Netflix. I know! It’s a hard habit to break. But making time for our own sleep is the ultimate act of self care!

I recently did this because I found myself suffering signs of sleep deprivation after weeks of staying up late and waking early. Let me tell you! It was so worth it! My to-do list continued to grow but I did not stay up late to finish it because my priority that week was to get to bed early so that I could be more productive overall. This was very hard for me but as a sleep consultant I made it my mission that week to practice what I preach!

Prioritizing Sleep May Just Be the Missing Puzzle Piece

You may be thinking that you don’t need to place sleep as a high priority because you practice healthy living in other ways. Maybe you eat right, exercise daily, and meditate. That’s fantastic! Amazing! Keep doing that. I’m not saying that sleep should replace all those other healthy habits. But maybe, just maybe sleep is the missing piece to the puzzle. If you consider yourself to live a healthy lifestyle but you are only getting six or seven hours of sleep per night, you may be missing a very important piece to the puzzle that can elevate you to the next level.

When you are better rested you can focus better, you have more energy, and your mood improves. Not to mention that while you sleep your body is busy regulating your metabolism and performing immune repair. That’s a lot of work happening overnight so we should give our body the time it needs to recharge and repair so we can thrive during the day.

Take Back Your Sleep

I wasn’t always this passionate about sleep! It wasn’t until I was no longer in charge of my own sleep that I realized just how precious it is. When my daughter was born, my chance of getting quality sleep seemed to evaporate overnight!

Perhaps you’ve been reading this thinking “yeah…okay… easier said than done” because you have a child who is keeping you from getting the quality sleep you need and deserve. If this is you, trust me, I get it! I was right there with you not that long ago! It’s exactly this scenario that sparked my passion for sleep, specifically pediatric sleep.

The first step in prioritizing your own sleep is to help your little one sleep well. I have created a Free Guide to Sleeping Through Night for parents just like you! Download it now as your first step towards prioritizing sleep for your entire family!

   Melissa lives in northern Saskatchewan, Canada with her husband and two-year-old daughter. After overcoming sleep struggles with her own daughter, Melissa became passionate about helping other families get the sleep they need and deserve. She wants parents to know that sleep deprivation does not need to be a normal part of parenthood and that other options are available. When Melissa isn’t talking about sleep, she enjoys scrapbooking and travelling with her family.


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